Bullying Beyond Belief
Once again a violent tragedy at an educational institution causes us to stop, shake our heads in disbelief, question why and how? Once again there are no simple answers. What we can do as educators and parents is recommit ourselves to supporting and developing the spirit of students, protecting it and becoming more aware of the daily demise of personhood as it gets picked away at over the years from bullying.
While not all victims lose their physical lives, very many suffer silently from it and sometimes become bullies themselves.
Ronald Stephens, Executive Director of the National School Safety Center, describes bullying as "one of the most underrated but enduring problems in school today." In the U.S. according to Family Education.com, "Surveys show that as many as one in four kids say they’ve been bullied recently in school".
What you can do to help your children protect themselves from bullying?
- Encourage your child to tell you, or another adult at school.
- Explain the difference between tattling and telling. Telling is when you report that you or someone else is in danger. It is not about just trying to get someone else in trouble!
- Encourage a buddy system. Jeanette Collins of the New Jersey Center For Assault Prevention says "parents should encourage their kids to reach out to other kids. That way they can watch out for one another. A child who has friends is less of a target."
- Enroll your child in a self defense course. Contrary to some people's belief, this stresses self esteem, confidence and self control, not aggression.
- Eliminate television shows and cartoons that are aggressive, or violent in nature. Violence and meanness is rampant and causing desensitization of many children and adults to non-violent solutions to conflict.
- Express your concerns to your school teacher and principal. Find out what their policy is and how it is implemented. Some policies just pay "lip service" to important issues as this. If it does not seem to be strong enough get involved in your PTO to have it improved.
The newest area of abuse is "cyber-bullying". This can be even more devastating for a child as the power of the internet brings what once was a personal, private, emotional struggle into the forefront with excessive numbers of school mates and strangers becoming aware of the individual being bullied. Even moreso, the threats follow the victim, invading what was their only shelter and haven of protection - their home.
- Monitor your child's internet usage. Teach them to only speak to people they know and don't open mail from an unknown sender. Do not reply to harassing comments and block or ban your e-mail and IM programs to prevent further attempts.
For more extensive information and support about the issue of bullying go to:
